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Dear Friend,

Have you ever felt a little lost? A little unanchored? Like a boat without a rudder?

This past fall, my family gathered in a lovely rustic cabin at the edge of a lake in the Poconos. We were celebrating my daughter’s 45th birthday.

It was a glorious day – bright blue sky, leaves lightly lilting in the cooler air of fall, the crystal-clear lake shimmering in the sun.

I ventured out in a pedal boat with my hubby and two grandchildren. Moving across the lake at a snail’s pace, clearly there was something wrong with the rudder. We had to pull hard and constantly on the rudder’s handle to get it to go where we wanted to go. At the same time, the paddle wheel (the thing that propels you forward) was largely ineffective. It felt like we were in shallow water and the rudder was continually getting stuck in the sandy, sludgy bottom of the lake.

It took a long time to get from one end of the lake to the other and then back again. Both my husband and I got a little bit frantic trying to get the dang thing back home. We tried madly jiggling the handle, turning it aggressively from left to right, we switched seats at the risk of capsizing.

But that little boat had a mind of its own…or at least a rudder and paddle wheel that would not be rushed. So, eventually we just accepted it was going to take time and more labor than we had bargained for.

So it is sometimes with feeling stuck. Or feeling a little lost. It’s uncomfortable, and downright annoying!

There are things you can and should do – in this case, if we wanted to return home, we needed to keep peddling and steering with the rudder.

But it’s also a matter of time.

I absolutely want to rush the process. I’m a forward mover. I love setting my direction and intentions through my annual vision board. I love helping others do the same, have their aha moment, their breakthrough so they can live out their dreams. However, sometimes we just have to slow down.

If we're to get unstuck and learn a little, we have to reflect on what got us stuck. In my case, this wasn’t one thing, it was a series of things.

• First, I had sciatica that forced me to mostly be bedridden for six weeks. I went to my physical therapist. Otherwise, I rested…or at least did my work mostly lying in my bed.
• I spent my days alone. That left me feeling isolated, but at the same time I wasn’t up for seeing anyone and couldn’t go anywhere and sit comfortably.
• In this compromised position, I felt stunted, stifled, stopped from moving forward in all the things that were in motion, particularly my new podcast. I had no energy or drive to continue that.
• All this added up to me having a sense of malaise, a little depressed, and sinking slowly in a small patch of quicksand. I wasn’t going completely under, but I didn’t know the way forward.

7 Ways I’m Getting Unstuck and How You Can Too

1. Find a goal – I was going on a trip of a lifetime to Italy. I had to be able to walk.
2. Do everything you can – In my case, rest, physical therapy three times a week, heavy doses of ibuprofen and a muscle relaxant, a spinal cortisone injection, and eventually forcing myself to walk with difficulty around the parameter of my house.
3. Use the power of your mind – Mind over matter is not just a saying! Getting better enough to walk thousands of steps every day in Italy took a lot of self-talk. It started at home. “I can’t do it. I can’t walk today.” “You will not be able to enjoy your trip if you don’t get up and get out. Just take a few steps.” And then, once I was in Italy…”I just can’t walk to the restaurant tonight.” “The more you move the better you feel.” Or when I faced navigating 1600 steps down to the beach in Positano. “You can, you can, you can.” And guess what? I did!
4. Wait – Even after my wonderful trip, the feeling of stuckness returned. I still wasn’t and still am not sure what the way forward is. So, I’m continuing to give myself some time. I’m starting to see the path forward, but I’m certain it can’t be rushed.
5. Process – I know we miss the lessons when we go too fast. And I believe there is gold in this season, so I’ve returned to some journaling. This helps me process
6. Act – By the same token, since I’m now feeling more energized, it’s time to try a few things. I’ve been still long enough. For example, I had been writing regularly to you up until May, and I’ve been thinking of you so I decided today was the day to get in touch. I’ve also re-entered some communities, like my beloved MOPS meetings, where I chat and mingle as a Mentor Mom with younger moms.
7. Pray and Press – I didn’t turn from God, but I didn’t press into Him either during this strange time. I did my devos, prayed short prayers. But my heart and mind wasn’t really in it. I feel like I’m returning to the deeper walk I need to feel fully connected to my big, beautiful, powerful God. As usual, I feel welcomed back with a huge, warm embrace. Instead of sensing God saying, “Where’ve you been? Don’t you know better?” I’ve sensed Him saying, “Welcome, I’m so glad you’re feeling better. Settle in right here beside me and let’s chat. I’ve been here waiting for you all along.”

That’s my story and the lessons learned. As I’ve said, I’m not exactly sure of the way forward. But I know I love connecting with you…and I love sharing my stories in hopes that when you’re dealing with something similar, they can help you feel you’re not alone and you too will be okay.

Hit reply. I’d love to know how you’re doing. Are you stuck? Let me know what you’re celebrating or struggling with. I want to help.

Always in your corner,

Elise

P.S. Have you entered the Begin Within Giveaway? I'm delighted to be partnering with Twyla Franz of The Uncommon Normal. She cultivates gratitude through a series of stories featured at Begin Within and is celebrating the two-year anniversary of this inspiring series. The prizes are unbelievable - books, devos, pens, journals, cozy blanket and slippers, gift certificates ($100 Amazon Gift Certificate!), and more. You could win!! Click here.

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Looking for peace that can't be shaken despite these unsettling times? Join me and my three co-authors Jodi Kinasewitz, Jess Carey, and Michele Wilbert. Through stories, Scriptures, prayers, and questions for reflection, we invite you to to keep your heart anchored to the ultimate source of peace.

​Get Unshakable Peace in an Unsteady World Here. ​

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